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    Clarifying Conversations: Master the Art of Fact-Based Living

Clarifying Conversations: Master the Art of Fact-Based Living

I recently had the privilege of hearing a presentation by Ron Karr, President of the National Speakers Association.   During his workshop, he had us do an exercise that quickly illustrated why we often have difficulty with our communication.  He gave us a seemingly simple word – race – and asked us to write down 10 […]

Do You Fear the Volcano Effect?

So many of my clients struggle with speaking up when they need to.  And time and time again it comes down to staying quiet out of fear. People in their lives have been loud and angry.  Or, they have had periodic bouts of angry spewing themselves.  The resulting fear of voluminous communication stops them in […]

Tell Them What You Want! It Really Could Be That Simple.

Some of the solutions I help clients through could really be very simple; however, we have this tendency to get in our own way sometimes.  Recently I spent yet another session working with a new client who is frustrated with his team.  “They won’t do what I need them to do.  They are professionals.  They […]

Sometimes the Why Just Doesn’t Matter

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve worked with clients who are struggling through challenges with a person who is making poor choices.  Generally the conversation morphs into a guessing game style diagnosis of why:

Why someone isn’t showing up for work on time?
Why the person is so angry?
Why someone has a commitment phobia?

And […]

Are you Blending or Bleeding?

One of my clients was recently struggling to gain control of his schedule. He was constantly handling home tasks during work and work stuff during his nights and weekends. He was trying to make it all fit into the appropriate segment of time but couldn’t make it happen and was feeling frustrated. It suddenly hit me; some of […]

You are the Worst!

Did this title make you feel angry or defensive?  How dare I?  I wonder, though, how often are you telling yourself this very thing?

Maybe not in those exact words but do any of these sound familiar?

You can’t get anything right!
You are so stupid!
You are ugly!
Your butt is way too big!
You are so lazy!
Just give up! […]

Adjust Your Mindset for Great Correction

So many of my clients resist having correction conversations with their team members. And, yes, that’s what I like to call them. Whether you engage in the communication with the aid of a discipline form, a performance improvement plan or have them without documenting anything at all, ultimately, your goal is […]

How Do I Stop the Drama without Engaging in it Myself??

I recently conducted a webinar for a large group and had this question come up.  It’s one I hear quite often, actually.  I can answer it simply but realize that execution can be a bit more difficult.  The results are well worth it though, so give it a try. I prescribe to the concept of […]

No More Anger Management!!

So often I encounter teams of leaders who feel they need no assistance with conflict resolution when it is so apparent that they do. “We are not angry. We do not fight. Everything is fine!” The fact that they are not yelling at each other is not the litmus test that determines whether or not […]

Is There Lettuce in My Teeth?

Recently, while home alone, I passed a mirror and realized that I had something in my teeth. Thankfully I caught it before I walked out the door! But, because I seem wired for turning every life experience into a teaching moment, it got me thinking; how many of the people in my life would […]